Believe it or not – before I had my daughter – I was quite content in the thought of being the cool aunt that travelled to far off lands and came back with cool souvenirs and clothes from distant lands. I was diagnosed with PCOS and a tilted ovary when I was 18 years old and pretty much decided that I wouldn’t kill myself at the thought of not having much of a chance to have children. I would not live my life trying to get pregnant. If it happened it happened … and if it didn’t and I did want kids, I would adopt a couple of 4 or 5 year olds.
Low and behold, I have my beautiful little girl. If you have read any of this blog – you know that she is the very reason I believe I was placed on this planet. I love, love, LOVE being a mom.
That is I love being … HER mom. I do not want anymore kids.
Wait … let me clarify that … I do not want to be pregnant again. EVER. Besides the multiple failed pregnancies that I have had – plus this one that was scarier than a Nightwalker in the winter – I’m good. What really aggravates me is people telling me that I need to have another one so she could have a brother or sister.
Why should I? Seriously? I don’t knock anyone for having multiple kids. Bless your hearts and your patience. I can’t do it. I know my limits. My one is my limit. I don’t even like to babysit other people’s kids. I never volunteer. If I do offer to watch someone else’s child – trust me – I really like your kid. I can think of 3 people who’s children that I have offered to watch and would do it on a regular basis. One of these kids, I am actually related to. Do you get my point?
I have no plans to have another C- Section, I have no plans to lay up in another hospital to have another child. I have no plans to nurse ever again. None. Some people ask me – what if you meet someone and he wants more children. My answer is usually, what if I meet someone and he already has children? What if I meet someone and he wouldn’t mind adoption? The possibilities are endless – and they all end with me not pulling another child out of my body.
I envy women who have wonderful glowing pregnancies. I did not have that luxury unfortunately. With knowing that reality – why would I put myself through that torture?
You see, I am about to be 35. THIRTY – FREAKING – FIVE. It is my personal belief not to have children out of wedlock – and I currently cant take dating anyone for more than but a short period of time (and we shall leave that topic alone for another post) My plans include travelling the world with my TWEEN-ager – not being at parent teacher conferences at 50. Just not my life – someone’s, not mine. I would love to invest all my time and love and money into my daughter – so she can have all the things that I never had. Like I said – should I feel the need, I am open to adoption. That is a big MAYBE.
I get really annoyed at people telling me – you need to have more kids! She needs a brother or sister! No one NEEDS a brother or sister – trust me. I got this kid right. She’s perfect why rock the boat?